November 11, 2006

For God's sake, you are a goddess. So, behave like one!

God has a right to be stressed too. Because it's all not-knowing.

xxx

During the church wedding, this was spoken by the pastor:

To love with action and in truth. For love with action but no truth is hypocrisy and love in truth but no action is brutality.

This is my interpretation:

To love someone means you take a proactive position to do the things that show you love (in my most recent case, someone is) her. You act to love. Don't just base it on feelings. You do something, no matter how little, everyday, to show you care and you love her. Because love is a verb.

To say that you love someone means that it's nothing but the truth. And you are committed to loving her. You mean it as a truth and in all that you do, it shows reflections of that love for her. Because truth is about belief.

xxx

It always started with some kind of attraction, infatuation even. Then, it might progress to hypocrisy. All those gifts, all those attention, all those 'all-I-want-is-to-be-with-you's. Maybe action and truth happened in the interim, when everything seems to be on a plateau. Then, questions and doubt started appearing. But, the comfort zone was just established. So comfortable, so taken for granted that love became a feeling, not a verb. Sometimes, just a little bit more freedom was preferred. Sometimes, restlessness. Sometimes, boredom. Then, it became brutality. Then, conscience pricked. Then, there was no more brutality but also no more truth. And of course, no more action too. Then, there's all there was to it.

In the end, there's only emptiness and pain. And cough syrup.

And some very good friends. Who can help distract from pain, from loneliness, can light a beacon from the end of the tunnel. But, can't help piece a broken heart, can't interpret your life for you, can't walk you out of the tunnel.

xxx

Nobody said sainthood is going to be easy. Nobody said marriage is. In fact, nobody said anything at all. It's all only in your mind.

Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 22:32